Getting Played?

Sometimes what you believe to be happening is not really happening at all. I'm saying this because what if you find out or suspect there is something else going on - something entirely different than what you originally thought.

What if the strongest defense mechanism in the world, Denial, has kept your mind so preoccupied with what you want to hear, what you hope will happen - you actually miss the biggest point of all . . .

It hurts to know that little feeling in the back of your mind, could of been telling the truth the whole time. But, it was the last thing you wanted to admit to yourself and it was the last thing you could actually believe.

And, even now with the possibility of that little nagging voice becoming a reality - you find your stomach lurching onto the floor. And you watch it - wriggling around a little bit.

That is the feeling of reality settling in and now you're forced to come to terms with it, on two levels . . . mentally and physiologically.

Denied

Is it just sex?

Dirty and raw

Both using each other

And getting stringed along

Ability to detach

Was always a fear

Would I know when

Fanaticisms are no longer there

The need to be touched

In the gentlest way

Hands gaze against the skin

Watch the ardor disappear